Sunday, December 6, 2009

Redneck OCD, I has it.

I recently bought one of these steam cleaners at Big Lots for $59.00.  And I feel like I've already cleaned enough with one gallon of distilled water to cover that cost in cleaning chemicals when applied by hand upon  the same areas.

This is the greatest cleaning tool I HAVE EVER USED!  I get pretty grossed out when I think about how dirty I left things that I thought were clean when I "washed" them with cleaning products.  Cleaning products that burned my hands Slap!  Up! Not to mention me coughing for air or losing the ability to taste!!  

I really, REALLY want to keep cleaning.  I can't stop, even as gross as the process is to get things clean.  I want to keep going and going and going!  The kitchen and bathroom floors get so clean they squeak.  I have so much serious love for this machine I want to kiss it on the lips.  I thought I saw the Kitchen Aid Stand Mixer look at  me a little on the bitchy side while I was steam-mopping the kitchen floor.  "Jealous much, KASM?"  Shark's indigo eyes batted up to the counter-top.

That's why I am diagnosing myself with Redneck OCD.  I keep catching myself saying, "Hey ya'll, WATCH THIS!" as I beg for an audience to witness me wash away the missed splatters on the wall behind the trashcan.  Living in a house full of males makes me happy that at least most of the trash makes it into the can at all.  I yield my weapon for what it is, my Direct Steam Power Wand of Awesomeness.

The only down side to my new toy is the fact that we live in an unincorporated area and have very hard well-water so you can only clean as much as your inventory of Distilled Water of Germ Killing Mass Destruction will allow. Also, you have to have plenty of cheap towels to wipe up the left over steam-water.  

Now I sit in my Fortress of Solitude and think.  I must decide if I am going to enjoy the rest of my afternoon relaxing after all of that work ... or will I work up enough courage to find myself driving to the pusher-man's house for another hit?

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