Doing it for the flowers

Sometimes I feel bad for my downstairs neighbor.  I'm wearing my wedge shoes today and my feets are a bit on the stompy side.  I know the noise up here can be loud from time to time.  I was the downstairs neighbor for a good five years and during that time a guy who ran on a treadmill lived upstairs.

I think about how my neighbor, who shows absolutely no physical signs of being handicapped or have limited walking abilities, refuses to park in the 30 or so available spaces on the asphalt.  He parks in the freaking GARDEN under the magnolia tree.  Every.  Single.  Day.  Because that 10' walk to you door is a wicked killer, amirite?

I pray for rain each day he is here (doesn't work very hard, only here about 25% of the time - not a very successful business model if you ask me).  The garden area is low-lying and collects a ton of water when the sky leaks.  He even DROVE OVER the patch of bell flower things that despite being driven over all winter, still emerged when awakened by spring.  While the damn things are in bloom!

When fat girl decides to wear cute, strappy wedges to work it actually sounds like BIG FOOT is answering the phones up here.  And she does NOT want you tiptoeing or driving on the mf-ing tulips!!!

15.21

Math, I hates eeet!

Necessary evil that it is, math proves that if my cycles continue at their current rate of 24 days I'll have 15 periods this year.

I'm totally having a Quinceañera for my uterus this December.

(I thought this was a trick coffee cup but it's actually a vase.)

I don't want to and you can't make me. Dammit.

I've been sitting on the sidelines because I haven't been good company lately.  I got an RX that makes that a bit better and while I continue to struggle with the good and evil in taking a pill, I'm ... I am.

Facebook is totally killing my blog and making me lazy.  That's what the title is about.  I'm in a pissy mood and I should be working.  At least I wrote it here instead of cheating and dumping it on FB.  (Which today, my status reads:  is feeling stabby today.  HRUMPH!)

I am absolutely SICK AND TIRED of folks who are SICK AND TIRED!

Last week Junior was diagnosed with a double ear infection, sinus infection and pink eye.  I wanted to just break his leg while we were in the doctor's office so we could get that tended to as well.  SHEESH!!  Since he was so full of bugs he had to take the nastiest antibiotic known to man.  Twice a day for FOURTEEN DAYS.  Our health insurance gives us free prescriptions so I had the $30 to buy bribes to get him to take the 3 ml of milky white sand liquid twenty-eight times.  Twenty.  Eight.

Then the Husband brought home a cold from work.  And of course, he doesn't ever want to go to the doctor to get meds  to fix him so I get to listen to him hack and cough.  Even when I'm sleeping.  Or rather, trying to sleep.  WTF is wrong with men?  When I am sick, I go to the doctor, take my meds and try to be extra quiet when I'm coughing up a lung.  You know, still be considerate to others that I live with.  Especially when it's 3:00 in the morning and everyone is asleep.  I sure have enjoyed the past week in the bedroom.  SNARK!  I don't even have to put a quarter in the Magic Fingers to get the bed all shaky, Sir Hacks a Lot does it for me.

Woot!  You are sucking major ass.  How come the Woot Offs have been consistently coinciding with my mortgage payment's due date?  I have to save all month to pay it and then you dance your wiggly butt across my screen trying to get me to buy something.  And you're doing it on Kids.Woot! at the same time!!??  I thought you were my friend and that you loved me.  Buncha whores.

Jeebus, after re-reading this I don't think I'm good company NOW, let alone over the past few months!!  I'm hungry and I'm going to go bitch me up some lunch.