This week in Boy Land...

WELCOME TO SPRING BREAK.  THESE ARE THE RULES.

NOBODY COMES OVER TO HANG OUT AT MY HOUSE.

YOU MAY COME AND GO AS YOU PLEASE IF:

1.  YOU CALL ME FIRST AND ADVISE OF WHO YOU ARE WITH, WHAT YOU PLAN TO DO AND WHEN YOU WILL BE HOME.

2.  ALWAYS HAVE YOUR CELL PHONE ON.

3.  ALWAYS HAVE YOUR HOUSE KEY.

4.  YOU MAKE SURE MYA IS TAKEN CARE OF BEFORE YOU GO:  WATER IN DISH, MAKE SURE SHE’S NOT LEFT OUTSIDE, MAKE SURE SHE’S NOT TOO HOT IF LEFT IN THE HOUSE.

BEFORE YOU LEAVE THE HOUSE, YOU MUST MAKE SURE YOU SECURE IT!!  WINDOWS CLOSED AND LOCKED, DOORS DEADBOLTED.  IF I COME HOME AND FIND AN UNSECURED AREA, I WILL TAKE YOUR STUFF TO THE PAWN SHOP JUST LIKE A FREAKIN’ THEIF.

YOUR CURFEW FOR THE WEEK IS 10:00 PM, PERIOD.

REMEMBER THAT HUSBAND IS OUT OF TOWN THIS WEEK SO DON’T MAKE ANYTHING DIFFICULT FOR ME.  IT WILL NOT BE PRETTY.

THANK YOU FOR BEING SMART.  WEAR CLEAN UNDERWEAR, SAY PLEASE AND THANK YOU, YADDA, YADDA.